TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS : Maria!
______________________________
TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
FRANK : The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
______________________________
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables!
______________________________
TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
______________________________
TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday you said it's H to O!
______________________________
TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we
didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE : Me!
______________________________
TEACHER: Goss, why do you ! always get so dirty?
GOSS : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
______________________________
TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE : I is...
TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
______________________________
TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
______________________________
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry
tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his
father didn't punish him?"
LOUIS : Because George still had the axe in his hand.
______________________________
TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers
before eating?
SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
______________________________
TEACHER : Clyde, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the
same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, teacher, it's the same dog!;
______________________________
TEACHER : Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when
people are no longer interested?
HAROLD : A teacher.
Fortune cookie:
Monday, December 03, 2007
FW: kids
B-logged by xabales aka C.P. Time: Monday, December 03, 2007 - Labels: FWD emails, Jokes, Philosophy, Real Stories, Text 0nly
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